Tying it all together. Why we pray at dinner.

We were having dinner last week when my eldest boy, age 4, began playing with the head of the fried fish we were going to eat.  Our normal response is to tell him not to play with food and that it will give him a tummy ache.  He stopped, but only long enough to stuff his mouth with rice and fish.  While chewing, he went back to molesting the fish head. I furrowed my brow, flared my nose, and tensed my lips to display to him my displeasure.  Apparently, to a 4 year old, this means to keep going.  So I silently asked the Lord to give me the right words.

I held his hand, looked in his eyes and said, "Lito, you must respect the food that you eat."
      "Why Daddy?" he asked pulling his hand away.
      "That fish gave up it's life so that we can have food in our tummies."  Oh, I felt so proud of myself and I smiled a big happy smile.
      "But why did the fish do that?"  My smile soon vanished as I thought for an instant.  I remembered the advice I had gotten at a parenting workshop; counter a "why" question with a "why" question of your own.
"Do you know why we pray before dinner?"  I asked Lito.  There was no answer.  "We pray to thank God for providing this fish so that we can eat and be full and live."  I see the wheels turning in his head as he nodded.  For the rest of the dinner that night, the fish head lay in peace.

It must have worked because it's been a week and he has yet to abuse food on the table.  Thank you Lord for giving me the right words and putting the right people in front of me.  Now what to do with him using soo much toilet paper.

Aloha,
J.

Happy Earth Day!

Earth Day is a day for activism for sustainability and a cleaner environment.   

The thing about self-reliance is that it encompasses many different types of people from the tree hugging liberals to the gun wielding preppers.  The common bond is gardening.  Gardening is a great way to help the environment.  It adds green, oxygen producing plants to spaces that didn't before.  You can reduce waste going to the dump by composting.  It provides a stress reducing, relaxing environment.  I also get to teach my sons where fruits and vegetables come from, why worms should not be stepped on, but returned to the soil, and how plants drink water. 

We've been gardening for a year now.  We started with 3 tomato plants and 3 eggplants.  Out of the original plants, 2 tomato plants died after 2 months.  Those were soon replaced by tomato plants given to us by family.  Those were proven to be much hardier and produced nice tomatoes.  1 eggplant died in November of last year.  That one was replaced by a different type of eggplant which produces bigger fruits.  So it isn't bad to lose plants.  You learn as you go.  You find out what works and how much water is needed.  You find out if it's disease or just leaves withering like they should.  It's like being  a first time daddy/parent.  You worry about things with your first child.  When the 2nd child comes along, you are much wiser and not worry as much. 

This year, we've added some manoa lettuce, planted some okra seeds, and my mother-in-law got into the spirit by planting some bittermellon.  I also get to learn something myself as I just started propagating my good tomato plants by planting cuttings and saving seeds.

My boys get a chance to get dirt under their fingernails instead of playdoh.

It is a good learning experience for all.  Good for the environment.  Good for our family.  Happy Earth Day!

Aloha, J.

Book Review: COURAGEOUS: Honor Begins at Home.

Book Review:


COURAGEOUS: Honor Begins at Home by Randy Alcorn.  (This is the book adaptation of the movie with the same name.)

I enjoyed the story and recommend it to all men.  It does not matter if we are a dad ourselves or not.  We can be a positive influence over the young.  This would make a great gift for father's day or for new or expecting dads.

COURAGEOUS is centered around four sheriffs and their lives on and off duty.  When a tragic event happens to one of them, they begin to change their lives.  It is a story about what it means to be a father and head of the household.  It also shows varying degrees of being a father; from the nonexistent to the pinnacle of fatherhood.  It is also a social commentary on why being an engaged father or a positive father figure is essential in turning the tide against drugs, gangs, and abortions.

The story is sprinkled with Christian values and scripture that is not too overpowering.  I would compare it to other stories that use Buddhist or Confucian teachings as a teaching tool.

Being without a father for the early part of my life, I identify most with the character Nathan Hayes.  We know what it feels like to be without a father and we don't want our children to grow up without one.  We would do anything to protect our children, raise them right, and raise them with love.  We both found our own father figures.  Nathan found his in a man in his neighborhood who taught him values and good moral character.  I found mine in my uncle and eventually my step dad whom my mother married when I was 13.  We strive to be good role models for our family and also in our professional lives.

The story encompasses all types of fathers  from the "disconnected" dad who comes home from work and stares at the TV, to the"non-existent" dad who has kids but is separated from them and their mother.  There is a saying, "you don't know what you don't know."  In my circle of friends and family, we have never discussed how we are as a father.  How can you better yourself if you don't compare yourself to other fathers?  In this story, you can compare yourself with other dads and find your strengths and weaknesses.  What appealed to me most is that where ever you are on the father spectrum, it doesn't mean you are stuck there.  Improve on your faults and reinforce your good qualities.  You can better yourself for the good of your family and also encourage others to do the same just by simply reading and lending this book.

I hope you enjoyed the review.

Aloha,

J.

The Pallet Garden.

A friend of mine shared this photo with me.  I like it!   Not only does it recycle old wood shipping pallets, you can pretty much plop it anywhere and have a garden.  Think about apartment balconies or building rooftops.

Here's the original post word for word:

Got Pallets?
Hate weeding?
 Don't feel like turning up a bunch of grass?
Use a pallet as a garden bed - staple garden cloth on the backside of the pallet fill with dirt and start growing!
You can also place your pallet on the ground in a rocky location rather than a grassy area, this way you will not need the garden cloth to stop the weeds and grass comin through.
Please be advised: Use raw wood pallets!
Some that are shipped overseas may contain chemicals. Where I am from most are from raw wood - not saying that everywhere is!
And for those of you that don't know where to get pallets - look in industrial areas, hardware stores etc.
This was just an idea - some inspiration for everyone.
Enjoy!

In my opinion, this is probably the nicer/cheaper alternative to the bucket garden we have going right now.

Happy gardening and may you be blessed with abundance for 2012!

Aloha,
J.